- WiFi: connected
- Me: then fucking act like it
put 100 kids in a room…. kill 10… only 90 kids will remember this
i hate porn. “ohh fuck my ass!!!” you fuck your own damn ass
Everyone is so stupid shut up
Using y = mx + b to measure the slope of that ass
Mathematically incorrect. Unless the ass was linear, but that’s biologically incorrect. You’d probably wanna use something like y=ax^2+bx+c because the ass is a second degree polynomial curve.
did you major in booty math
my mom went to high school with jamie lee curtis and one time they both got caught smoking pot together and jamie told the teacher it was my mom’s and my mom was suspended and jamie lee got no punishment so think about that next time you want some activia
the laxative yogurt lady fucked over my mom
dog goes woof
cat goes meow
i wipe my brow and i sweat my rust
cow goes moo
when a group of teenagers walks past you and starts laughing at you for no apparent reason
COSMO TIP #749: spice up your time in the bedroom with a little rough play. you could even engage in some “good cop/bad cop” fun! try slapping your partner across the face to get them heated and then yell something enticing like “WHERE’S MR. KRABS!?” you never know, they just might be the one.